In blog 62: Shaping a little personality: Zani is not sure she buys into the idea that a mom’s smell on the blanket in an incubator would comfort a baby and speed up its recovery. Then she notices the brown paper parcel with sprigs of lavender – most definitely not her Jake’s style!
I get up, tidy the couch and head off to the soon-to-be-baby-room. We are still debating whether the cost of baby furniture is worth the expense and whether we should rather invest in a good stroller and portable cot. A really good stroller would last long enough to carry more than one baby … maybe.
The rocking chair is non-negotiable, but that has turned out to be no expense, because Jake’s mom has offered us the one she used when Jake was a baby. I am really lucky that my in-laws are non-interfering, respectful folk. Judging from what I’ve heard at work, some in-laws and even some parents seem to have forgotten that the umbilical cord has been cut and rock up and rule as though their kids’ home is their own and, worse, that their children are incapable of raising a baby without their daily input. In these times I have almost been grateful for my absent mother …
I sit down in the rocking chair and pull the bag of baby goodies closer. We haven’t bought much yet, because I’ve been warned that one tends to go overboard and, with the baby shower coming up, we thought it would be better to wait. But I simply couldn’t resist buying everything on the list for the bag that needs to go to the birth clinic. That would be considered ‘being practical’, wouldn’t it? After all, what if Brandon decided to come earlier?
I laugh quietly to myself. What is it with us girls and shopping? And our ability to justify the shopping ever so innocently, every time, because, see, we got it on a … SALE!
Everything in the bag has already been wiped or washed, but I haven’t gotten so far as to sleep on the blankets so that my smell is absorbed. It would probably have been too early in any case, because we still have roughly eight weeks to go. I must admit, though, that I’m not sure I buy into the idea that a mom’s smell is such a comfort to a baby and that her smell on the blanket in an incubator would speed up a baby’s recovery. I make a mental note to add the question to my ‘Ask Miriam’ list.
I decide to have an early night and watch a girl movie in bed. However, there on the bed is a small brown paper wrapped parcel, tied with string and with sprigs of lavender. Presents always make me smile. I wonder who this is from? It doesn’t look like anything Jake would have thought of. A note has been scribbled on the paper:
To Zani, you are going to be a wonderful mommy, enjoy! Vee xxx
A book! The Secret Life of the Unborn Child. After a quick thank you text to Vee, I start flipping through the pages, catching snippets here and there. I like the part about shaping a little personality:
The nine months between conception and birth mould and shape personality, drive and ambition in very important ways. The chief source of those shaping messages is the child’s mother (not every fleeting worry/doubt/anxiety but patterns of feeling).
“Worry.” I was so busy reading about shaping a little personality that I completely forgot about Jake. It occurs to me that I haven’t heard from him yet, so I dial his number. The call goes straight to voice mail. I check to see when he was last seen on WhatsApp: 17.30. But the plane should have left at 17.00. What is going on? What time is it now? 19.27. And then the phone rings; it is Jake.
“Hi, Zani. We’ve just arrived in Cape Town; flight was delayed. Everything okay?”
“Why didn’t you let me know the flight was delayed?”
“Sorry, I was in the process of postponing tonight’s client meeting when the ‘phones off’ message was announced. Then I just lost track of time reading Vee’s book.”
“That’s okay. Were you the postman-cum-courier for the prezzy from Vee on my bed?”
“Yes, but, sweetie, I need to run. Sleep tight.”
“Love you, Jake.”
“Love you, Zani.”