BLOG 21 – COULD I BE PREGNANT?

Recap: The whirl of facts and figures Jake came upon while researching attraction, conception and foetal development is about to take on new meaning if – and only if – Zani is pregnant. Back to Zani, doing her level best to be cool, calm and collected.

It’s been ten days since our wonderful weekend at the Cradle. I know that something is different. I just know it. I haven’t missed a period yet, but my breasts have grown tender. I feel a little nauseous and have become very sensitive to smells and even flavours. I seem to be tired all the time and find it difficult to concentrate on work, a movie (even when the heartthrob in the leading role removes his shirt) and, worst of all, Jake keeps having to repeat what he’s said! I start getting up at night to wee and notice more of a discharge, although there isn’t any redness, irritation or smell.

Google, here I come! I type in early signs of pregnancy, pull pen and notebook closer and voila!

• Breast changes – tick!
• Frequent urination – tick!
• Nausea – tick!
• Increased vaginal discharge – tick!
• Sudden aversion to smells and tastes – tick!
• Tiredness and drowsiness – tick!

Six out of six – not bad for a novice! Smile. Broad smile. Can’t stop smiling. Then I Google pregnancy tests and up pop two options – a home urine test, or a blood test.

A home urine test works within minutes. Clear Blue: The earliest you can test with the most sensitive tests currently available is 5 days before your missed period (typically 10 days after ovulation). A blood test can be done days after conception, but you have to wait 24 hours for the results.

Mmm … just four days until my period is due. Much as my curiosity is eating me up, I’d rather wait, thank you very much. I’m no good with needles …

Back at work, I – Zani, ‘Employee of the Month’ for four consecutive months – often find myself staring out the window with a silly grin on my face. Can it be? Can it really be that easy?

Even though I know that I’ll have to wait a few days, I am still determined to get those pregnancy kits as back up – a girl has to be sure … so I dash out to the chemist at lunchtime. I am torn between saying something to Jake, or simply surprising him.

However I decide to play it out, I first need to make sure this isn’t just a case of wishful thinking, or over-excitement on my part.

So I buy three home-pregnancy kits.

Why three? Well, as I’ve said a girl has to be certain you know!

I wait for four long days and four endless nights. Each day I study the pamphlet from one of the pregnancy kits, hiding it deep under the sheets in the linen cupboard – very little chance that Jake will want to change the bedding this week, or any other week, mind you!

Today is the day of the expected period, and I awake at 5 am, feeling a little anxious. There is no sign of my period. Out comes Box 1…

Catching the first urine passed on the first day of your missed period sounds easy. But it’s not. Believe me. There’s nothing simple about it, especially when you’re a nervous wreck. Why doesn’t anyone offer classes in ‘Catching Urine for Women’? And, more importantly, an advanced class in ‘Catching Urine for Women with Trembling Hands’?